Happenstance

I know you must feel horrible right now. I mean, you’ve told the girl you like her and she dissed you, flat out, instantly, without a second of hesitation. And I’m sure you feel even more horrible because despite knowing you have no chance with this person, you continue to hope. You continue to send those good morning and good night messages. You still walk her home though she merely feels shy to tell you no. You still back her up at work when you have tons to finish yourself. I know you must be feeling so darn hopeless. I know, I think we all have been or will be in that position. That point, when you want someone so bad and though you get the feeling that it’s not and never will be mutual, you can’t quit liking the person.

Never give up, right? Shoot for the stars, yeah? Fake it ’til you make it, yes? I mean, pretend you’re not hurting. Act like it’s okay being turned down in little ways daily. Keep at it ’til you become a part of her existence, no? I mean, just staying and hanging in there would consume a person.

You’re almost certain she is all you will ever want, that she is all you will ever need, that she is the fulfillment of your happily ever after. I know…

But, friend, know this too : you can be wrong. She might never change her mind. She might have her eye fixed on something or someone else. She might never get used to having you around. Ultimately, she might not see you, more so love you, in spite of all the attempts that you make each damn day.

Love is just really a gamble that way. It’s how it is. We always risk, uncaring whether we win or lose our hearts and souls in the process. But not loving you back is not a fault you can pin on her, or yourself. Don’t think it’s because you’re not good enough or that she is way out of your league. In love and war, we are all the same, cliche as that sounds. The heart wants what it wants, simple as that. No way to force love.

But one day, all will fall in their proper places. Love just won’t be love if it is with the wrong person, at the wrong time, in the wrong happenstance.

Friend, you’d meet the girl. And she’ll see your soul beyond your eyes and words and actuations. And you’ll see through her, too. She’ll make the wrongs feel right because everything that has failed in the past led to this moment and everything else that comes next.

Friend, just keep loving… You’ll know when it’s the right person, at the right time, and it won’t last like any typical spur of the moment happenstance you’ve ever, ever had.

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