I know it is pointless to write to you now because you’ll never get to read it. But similar to how you had to take your life due to the monsters hounding you, I also feel the need to air out my emotions in order to deal with your passing and how you chose to do it. Forgive me for writing this piece. Forgive me if this comes too late.
My dear, we were never close but I have always paid attention to you from a distance. I don’t mean this in any scary way, it’s just that you were always a stand out. It’s not just your height, or your pretty face, or your cheerful disposition. In a room filled with energetic and interesting teenagers, you had an aura, a stare, a spirit, and a voice that made me fixate my glance and notice you exist. Quite frankly, I sort of watched out for you because I sensed you are a force to reckon with, a wonderful person in the budding, the kind any newbie instructor might get intimidated with. I’m sure your classmates felt the same too. I’m definite we were all drawn to you just because you were you. And remember that college program you hosted? Everyone saw how natural you were with the mic, how confident you seemed, how inspiring you were for owning the stage when most youngsters fear it. You were all that, you were. It’s unfortunate you weren’t able to see how amazing you are through your very own eyes. It’s heartbreaking you had to quit on that beautiful person. It’s devastating to face the fact that you are gone.
My dear, I pray you find peace. I pray you find the happiness you sought but did not find on earth. I pray you see from up above how you are loved and how you are terribly, terribly missed.